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Lift Off

21 Aug

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I took five 6am walks, ten evening walks, got depressed at the sight of a dead California Fox on the side of the road, said goodbye to a friend (co-worker leaving, not a funeral), never knew what to eat, managed to maintain composure and nose-wrinkling while sitting next to pungent, unhygienic bus co-passengers, groomed my dog, scared dog with a squeaky toy (totally didn’t know he was scared by squeaks and it put him off sleeping with us at night for two days), apologized, had some drinks, took the bus, called my Mom, painted a wall, made a list of projects to do, ran, wrote and illustrated. All completely irrelevant (because) – IT’S FRIDAY!

Have a great weekend!

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Birds Of A Feather

20 Aug

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Catholic Church. Sunset Boulevard.

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In The Thick Of It

18 Aug

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Last week, the marine layer refused to move, hovering over the city like bad smog. From atop the eighth floor of the parking garage at The Grove, nothing looks more ominous than toasted clouds caught in the hills. However, with the dense mist, there is a genial quiet and the smothered city sound is comforting.

The Reality Obsessed

17 Aug

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This is Murtz Jaffer.   He is the host of Canada’s half-hour television show titled Reality Obsessed. As explained by the Reality Obsessed website,

“each episode of Reality Obsessed has Murtz on the hunt for answers to a particular ‘big picture’ question in the realm of reality television. He’ll explore how reality cameras affect the outcome of a complete geek hooking up with a hot babe; how casting directors find the perfect mix of angels and monsters for the next big hit, or what happens after contestants’ 15 minutes of fame are up? It’s a full blown celebration of everything reality!”

He is also, as The New York Times reports, “regarded as the world’s foremost reality television expert because of his ability to predict, analyze and map out how programs will go.”    This is why Murtz is famous.  For someone with his own Wikipedia page, a long journalistic resume, and star power he’s pretty nice, and a particularly gracious host.

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This is what happens when you order bottle service.

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This is area – the club meant to look like a modern mid-century, Andy Warhol loving, living room. As if you’ve walked into your own trippy apartment renovated with bars, coruscating neon beacons, wooden tabletops, wooden ceilings and tables, plus lots of girls (guys had a tough time getting past the doorman – want to order a bottle? You’ll have to make it two). Par for the course, on the left you’ve got ass-cleavage, low-tops and slinky dresses – all shaking it out on the dance floor to the beat of hip-hop and remixed pop hits and looking for the closest table with a bottle – and on the right, mixed drinks at $12+ a pop from the cute blond bartenders.

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We decide to head to the back room.  A small and unimpressive space (compared to the flashing lights and booming music just outside the door) that looks like my parents basement circa 1989 – with better wallpaper.

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Turns out it was Murtz’ birthday (or around that time), and so everyone signed his banner.

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I expected obsessed fans/reality star pandemonium; fans were not stalking outside waiting for their favorite reality stars, but there were several winners from past reality seasons (Real World, Survivor, Amazing Race) and one fan named Ziggy.

Murtz said his goodbye’s and so did our friends. With that, it was time to turn in.

12:30am, On the road again.

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CNN

17 Aug

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This is CNN. At night CNN keeps the televisions going – casting passerbys in dark silhouettes against the incandescent transmission. Homeless men and women often sleep/eat/sit here for hours.

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For me, CNN represents the more serious aspects of life, and a harder and professional edge that reminds me of New York, and I imagine I am there.

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Just Some Sleep

7 Aug

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This weekend is all about the fluffy pillows and twelve hours in bed, hopefully all spent dreaming in REM. We have kept the dog. The dog is cute, and cuddly, and exciting and bite-y. He will have to be trained, but he is the best bit of scruff that’s crossed my path in years and I fully embrace this 6am walking, sometimes house-broken, chasing cars, thirteen pound wonder. But I am not sleeping and so today I’ve arrived tired and anxious for the day to be over; I hope that everyone has a great weekend!!

This coming Friday, I’ll be inundating you with pics of reality tv stars in a little event known as “Murtzfest,” featuring its’ reality tv super-fan host Murtz and a legion of reality tv showsters – because he’s such a megafan they gave him his own series.

Laters!

Scrambled Eggs…

5 Aug

My Father once said that it is no wonder Dr. Seuss was able to create such imaginative tales with likewise illustrations, because California is so endemically diverse in flora and the sunsets can’t be beat – though Theodor Seuss Geisel didn’t arrive in La Jolla, California until much later in his life, it is true that some of his most famous and best-selling work was written there. It is easy to imagine the tale of The Lorax, for instance (about environmentalism and anti-consumerism), threaded from the erstwhile disappearance of the Orange Groves that covered the hills of Los Angeles or perhaps, inspired by the sight of neighborhoods populated with hundreds of attenuated and bushy-haired palms; and The Grinch (about anti-materialism)…does not need an introduction to where Seuss conceived that story; the ‘Great American Dream’ and its’ accessories was widely advertised in his time (though I estimate that 1957 was a different cultural entity and not approaching today’s cultural compass in its materialistic tendencies, so Seuss was clairvoyant). Either way, California has a nice bit of exceptional scenery.

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Translation Needed

4 Aug

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The Highlands

28 Jul

Saturday alone meant cleaning. Five hours later, I was only a living room and barely a kitchen into cleansing my apartment of hairballs, dust mites, ancient junk mail and scattered clothing I regularly toss on chairs, tables and floors during the week. Then the hubby came home and I stopped, I was done cleaning, tired and hungry. So what’s better than a movie with popcorn? Grauman’s Chinese Theatre was showing Harry Potter, so among the concrete molds and throngs of gawking, cargo-short wearing tourists, we went to the best theatre – right after ArcLight Cinemas – the city has to offer. Grauman’s Chinese Theatre, famous for their traffic stopping premieres, nearby Kodak Theatre (home to the Academy Awards) and adjacent (and newly erected) Madame Tussaud’s Wax Musueum, is a spacious and comfortable venue. It’s easy to arrive late and still have a sublime seat of your choosing.   The movie was expectedly wonderful in plot, dialogue and cinematography and as is our habit, ColdStone was in order afterward, as well as a visit to the observation deck of the building deemed by Curbed LA as the “Ugliest Building” of 2007.   From atop, you can view the costumed characters begging for a dollar (for a picture with them of course), along the most frequented of all Los Angeles attractions, the Hollywood Walk of Fame.   The most invested of them being the White Angel (or the Black or Green one, depending on the night) out in flagrant dress.

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He’s spotted….from behind…but let’s go for a closer look…

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The front….

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The Babylonian themed Hollywood & Highland mall.

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…and in ironic juxtaposition to the Babylonian theme…Jesus.  With Spiderman.

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No Doubt

28 Jul

First, the Nu Sounds came on. A Swedish band whose female lead, despite her strong voice, echoed along the walls of a mostly empty amphitheater. By the time my Coors Light buzz started to wear off, the only thing I could think was “Please God, get this second rate, wannabe Gwen off the stage,” and that this gyrating blond harpy should stop her Swedish leg kicks and crotch splitting pole grinding – Where’s Gwen? Where’s Paramore, and when do the Nu Sounds stop singing?

Paramore then assumed the stage and took to it in running, jumping, head-bangin’ reverie.

There was a disappointing lack of red lipstick in the audience and not a platinum blond in sight – I was expecting to see a panoply of Gwen-lookalikes and wannabes. The crowd filtered in slowly, the ‘sold out’ show barely packed even after Paramore made their appearance. My need-to-be-early-everywhere punctuality felt more foolish than ever since I had so far watched each opening band in agonizing expectation of the main attraction.

But nothing mattered the moment No Doubt came on. When their shadows graced a backlit white sheet, the crowd erupted and so did I. Thus ensued over an hour of jumping, sweating, singing, shouting, cheerful accolades in response to Gwen’s superlative, ab-bearing performance. Best night ever.

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Goodnight.

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